NEW PSYCHIATRIC DISORDER IDENTIFIED -- THE ECONOPATH

As part of the effort to create new definitions of mental illness to increase drug sales, psychiatrists have identified a totally new and potentially extremely dangerous type of mental disorder that is on the increase in the United States.

"We have always had a good grasp of what a psychopath and a sociopath was all about, "said Dr. Fred Freud, head of the General Delivery University College of Medical Fraud, but we now realize there is a third form of this sicko behavior."

That third form of dangerous craziness involves business and the economy.

"We clearly have a type of person who manipulates business and economic situations solely for their personal benefit, with a total disregard for the consequences of their conduct on other people and institutions," said Dr. Freud.

"They congregate on Wall Street, and work for companies such as Goldman Sachs, AIG, Bear Sterns, Citicorp. and others," added Freud.

"The degree to which the Econopath is completely disassociated with the consequences of his conduct is when, even after causing hundreds of thousands of people to become homeless, he gets a big fat bonus and isn't at all ashamed of it."

"It is possibly the case that Econopaths actually kill more people than your garden variety psychopath, because the Econopath's impacts are far greater. How many people were driven to suicide, or fatal drink because of the economic collapse caused by the Econopaths?" asked Dr. Freud.

No treatment has been discovered that will stop an Econopath's tendencies to manipulate money to the detriment of others.

"The only way to protect society against econopathic behavior is to make this a capital offense, an shoot the bastards," said Dr. Freud. "They do that in China," he added.

Other examples of econopathic behavior is hiding data that shows cars, food or other products are unsafe.

"The Toyota management obvious had some Econopaths in their ranks," said Dr. Freud.

"Imagine, knowing your cars are killing people, but you hide the evidence?"

GDU experts are not sure why there is apparently a huge increase in the number of Econopath's loose in the country today.

"One theory is this is the result of Republican government loosening up economic regulations, "said Dr. Freud, "but then there are some experts who think Republicanism is a psychological disorder itself."